Saturday, January 29, 2011

Blew it...

Okay, I blew it today. I was planning on starting my healthy eating today, but I failed...again. I am so frustrated! I now weight 213lbs. I have been this heavy at one other time in my life. I feel depressed about it. I feel as though I will never be able to lose this weight and stop feeling like a fat girl. I have such self-destructive eating habits. When I mess up, I continue to eat because I feel so bad about it. I need to stop myself and not splurge anymore than I already have.

I started off great this morning by eating a yogurt, raisins, and a 100cal. bagel with WW cream cheese. Then we went to MoJo's. They have the best non-fat yogurt. Instead of just getting a little bit, I got a lot and added bad stuff like caramel and cookie dough. Ugh! Then we went to the mall and I got a chipotle wrap at Paradise Bakery. I also had a peanut butter and chocolate chip cookie. To top of this great day, I had a bowl of WW chicken noodle soup. Way too many calories and I find myself stuffed and miserable. When will I ever learn!

I so desire to be healthy, thin, and able to run. I want to enter a 5k, but I never will at this rate. Despite such a bad week of eating, I am determined to win this battle and become healthier. Food will not control my life! So, I am going to begin anew tomorrow and conquer this monster. I am determined!! 

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